If I were 17 again...

Have you ever wished you could turned back the clock? I often thought of that... If i could go against the time, i would wanna be 17 again =P that's when i could still have lots of time to plan my future and i would do it right this time. If i were 17 again, i would carefully plan my college year, went to Academy of Art in SF,...did whatever i could to enjoy my life to the fullest...

If i were 17 again, i would set my goal to graduate in 21, with 2 majors: graphic design and business management, plus a minor: creative writing (that includes movie scriptwriting). Then i would find a job in New York or other big cities, and worked there for 2 years. Meanwhile, i would began my career as a scriptwriter too.

Then i would go to Taiwan to learn Mandarin for a year, then go to Japan to learn Japanese for a year... Then i would go back to Jakarta, open a business... after it has established, I would apply a job in Focus on the Family, USA, where i could do meaningful things to help young people around the world. So by i am 25, i would have accomplished so much! And maybe.. just maybe, i would have got married by 27. If only i had this kind of mature thought when i were 17...

Too bad, it ain't happen :( I just gotta choose how i should live my life at this moment...

It's so funny how my life seems to just started when i am 30. Yes, that's how old i am right now. A 30-year-old girl, i might say. Many things to regret because i haven't used my time very well... but i just can't sit in those regrets. In my 30, i feel like a 17, who's trying to find her way of life. So here i am now... looking like a young naive girl who is ready to fly.

Why am i saying that? Because i know what i want NOW. NOW i know that i wanna be a writer who change people's lives. NOW i know i have passion more than just being a designer. So i had this crazy idea to leave my comfort zone, resign the job i have worked for 4 years with good pay... i called it as "running to higher direction" =P

Life is so boring when you don't know what you want... believe me, i've been there lately, it was awful!!! Then i realized i need to take actions on the passion i have had in heart for a loooong time. I will go to Taiwan =) hahhaha.. yes, to learn mandarin. That's just the first step, i might say. The first step to achieve higher purpose..what a big word, isn't it? But it's true.

Have you ever heard of a chinese proverb that says "A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step" ? I really hope this time will not just be another NATO (No Action Talk Only) plan of mine. Procrastinating is my worst enemy. Let's see ok... if this plan is really gonna work... (please, please, ...God... help me to do it right... *desperate to live fulfilling life* )